Hello. There was a creeping sense of sameyness in this week’s omnibus.
here we go again
Hannahrexic lurched into her next life crisis thanks to the arrival in the village of her spotty drugdealing icecream man Hollyoaks Later boyf Jamie. This being a Hannah life crisis this meant hours of Hannah BTMing, shrieking and flouncing off and Rhys shouting, looking constipated and unleashing his fists of fury to zero effect. Yawn.
Jamie himself loitered round the village all week like a particularly annoying tramp. We don’t like him and we think he is up to no good. A suspect for Sasha’s mugging last week? You know it.
Another vaguely familiar aspect to this storyline was Rhys’ predictably inept attempts to rid the village of it’s Jamie-shaped presence. When fisticuffs didn’t work, he inexplicably recruited Darren (swoon) for a spot of failed drug entrapment and kidnapping/assault. High marks for effort, D- for execution.
deja voodoo
Other happenings where we’ve been there, done that was Sheila’s comedic attempts to provide Elliot with cheese on toast/study support (not to mention Elliot once again turning down the opportunity for sex with a hot woman) and Malachy’s ongoing passive aggressive (read: pussy whipped) schemes to unplug Mercedes and Calvin, these including hopping aboard the property ladder and reuniting Calvin with his ex-missus Carmel. He is either a total wuss or a machiavellian genius. We cannot decide which.
in other news
Ravi opens a boxing club for chavs. Given that his last venture into the boxing world resulted in a craniotomy we think this is a perfectly sensible course of action; Carmel is given a random perm by Frankie; for the ten minutes he is on screen, Duncan spent 9.5 of them talking about or eating food; Cindy and Steph get all competitive mum/stepmum by entering Holly and Tom into Chester’s Got Talent; Holly is neglected and sad. Boo : (
film student moment
Various characters in noir-ish card games; Elliot gets Star Trekked; Rocky montage
MYEARS
Tony speaks street
Carmel refs colonically irrigating Frankie and Leo. Eww.
